When you first begin dating someone everything is new. You adore this person over look their flaws and think some of them are cute, you spend every waking moment with them, & you’d never let your eye wonder. But their are somethings you should do when your in a lasting relationship if you want the ship to sail smoothly. Not only do you have to initiate the spark, but their are some other key behaviors you should consider to continue your loving relationship into the future. Being that Aaron and I have been together for almost four years in a week, from time to time we have to remind ourselves to do the little things that brought us together & to remember that we are both individuals with needs. Below are some relationship rules & “keeping the spark” advice for you to acknowledge.

Relationship Rules

1. Commitment- Is key, if your not faithful most likely your partner will let you go unless you both have an arrangement where your alright with seeing other people. If you are unfaithful your partner might chose to forgive you, but on the other hand it is hard to get over something this distrustful. Love is a powerful thing, but sometimes it is not powerful enough to cure a bruised ego & a broken heart.
2. Honesty- It’s the best policy isn’t it? In a relationship trust is one of the biggest factors. This person has trusted you with their heart & life, so if your someone they can not trust they might have a hard time keeping you in their life. Lying in a relationship can be one of the worst things you can do. If you lost your job, spent a little extra money you were supposed to use for bills, or you don’t want to go/do something your partner wants let them now as soon as you can. It will be less dramatic and your partner will value your honesty.
3. Equality- When your in a long lasting relationship you can fasten the philosophy: “What’s Mine Is Yours” an to some aspect this is true. But don’t expect for your partner to take up on all the responsibilities. Also remember that you both are individuals with dreams, ambitions, and a life. So don’t dominate the calender and expect your partner to be happy about it.
4. R-E-S-P-E-C-T- This is a huge factor in a relationship, if you don’t respect each other then you can not truly love each other. If you are mad do not toss insults at your partner, doing so can result in your break-up. if your family, friends, or co•workers have said anything negative or out of line about your partner, you should let them know your stance on your relationship and that it is disrespectful to you talk about your partner.
5. Don’t Take Things To Personally- Have you ever heard of constructive criticism? If your partner says something to you that you find offensive, just let them know how you feel. Secondly, your partner might be seeing a problem forming, or trying to solve one and is giving you advice.
6. No “I’m Sorries”- Sometimes I am sure that you or your partner will come to the point were you will say I’m sorry. But you should not resort to saying it when you’ve just thrown something across the room in your hostile mood. After all, when you say I’m sorry all the time, Your partner or you might think of it as an excuse to act a certain way or do a certain thing to get away with it.
7. Communication- If you don’t talk your problems out they will still be unsolved. Make sure when you want to talk about something you are not upset, if you are go somewhere and just relax until you are not. Listening and Responding are two important things, if you do not do these things your not really solving anything.
8. Sex Please?!- Maintaining a healthy sex life is important. Just because you’ve seen and done it all doesn’t mean that you can just slack in this department. Try a new position, a new place, or maybe act out a certain fantasy. And always remember to tell your partner how you feel about your sex life, tell them what makes you feel good & what makes you feel uncomfortable. No one can read minds, so a little guidance is key.
9. Distance- if your going on a trip/work without your partner call them as often as you can just to talk and show that you care. Just because your in a different area code, doesn’t mean you can go wild and your free.
10. Maintain Your Life- It is healthy to maintain the life that you once had before you entered coupledom. Keep in contact with your family and friends, and maintain a healthy social scene. Don’t give up on your hobbies or activities that you enjoy. These things add spark to your relationship believe it or not because your keeping in track of what you had before, if the relationship doesn’t work you won’t feel as broken.

“Keep Your Spark”

1. Surprise!- There is something exciting about surprising your partner with an event or gift. It shows that even though you have been together for a while that you still care.
2. Plan Dates- After all, you get carried away with family,friends, work, and events. Setting time away for just the two of you is something important . You can go to a concert, a movie, or surprise your partner with museum/baseball tickets. Even it’s not something you’d particularly would want to do it is special for your partner.
3. Make Every Moment Count- Taking your partner for granted is something I strongly advise not to do. Sure they are always there but one day they might not be. Also if you show love and affection everyday not just Valentine’s Day it will show that person that they truly matter in your life.
4. Cuddle & Talk- before you go to bed, when you just get home, or when you just have time.
5. How Was Your Day?- another way of showing your partner that you care!

Question: How do/did you keep the spark in your relationship alive?